WHAT KIND OF PARENT DOES YOUR CHILD THINK YOU ARE?
Perceptions are all important.
Even more important than how something is, is how it is seen to be.
How it seems becomes how it is.
I'll let you in on a little secret--you are not the only one with an opinion about how they see themselves.
Your kids might think they're worse than awful, or that their mom and dad love them just as much but from different perspectives because everyone has those thoughts at least once when we look back over our lives.
And while some parents may say these things out loud (or maybe even meanfully),
it's more important to pay attention where children pick up emotions
What I would like you to do is check the statements in the following list that you feel are most descriptive of the things you say.
We all say some of these things sometimes, so check them off only if you say them often.
Try to answer the questionnaire as your child would answer.
Better still, if your child is cooperative and if you are willing to hear the answers.Have your child rate your answers with his answer sheet.
Compare your answers to theirs.
You may be surprised by what you learn.
- (D) Not right now.
- (V) I really liked the way you did that.
- (I) I don't know. Ask your dad
- (C) What were you thinking of when you did that?
- (D) Do it now
- (I) I'm too upset to talk to you.
- (0) You'd better let me help you.
- (C) You dummy!
- (0) It's none of your business.
- (I) I hate you.
- (V) That sh0ws you put a lot of work into it.
- (D) Clean up your room now!
- (1) I'll make you pay for this.
- (Di) I’m too busy.
- (C)I can't believe you did that.
- (O)It's just for us to worry about
- (V)I know it must be disappointing, Iknow you really tried.
- (D) Because I said so.
- (Di) I can't promise you.
- (I)I can't take this.
- (Di) I'm too tired.
- (D) That's my rule. That's why.
- (I)What do You think I should do?
- (C) You look terrible .Go and change.
- (O) Do you think you are ready for that
- (V) I'm so proud of you
- (I)I can't talk to him. You do it
- (Di)Can't you see I'm busy?
- (I)I can't tell your mom. It will upset her.
- (O)You'd better not move ahead without asking me first.
- (D)No, because I said so. You don't need a reason.
- (C) You never do anything right.Let me do it.
- (D) Get over here and do what I tell you.
- (V) You did that so well. Show me how to do it.
- (Di) Maybe tomorrow.
- (D) Stop it!
- (C) I can't believe you did that again when I told you not to.
- (C) Just what do you think you are doing?
- (O) I'll do that for you.
- (O) I am afraid you will get hurt.
- (V) You really are a great help.
- (Di) I might get to it tomorrow.
- (Di) I don't feel well. Do you mind leaving me alone right now.
- (D) I said to do it. so do it l
- (C) You really didn't want to do that didnt you?
- (V) Did I ever tell you how much I love you?
- (O) I was your age. was never allowed to do that when I was your age .
- (V) I really respect your opinion.
Count your check marks in each category.
D is the Demanding Parent
C is the Critical Parent
0 is the Overprotective Parent
I is the Inadequate Parent
Di is the Disengaged Parent
V is the Validating Parent